2024 Reflection and 2025 Goals

I went through and read this post from a year ago. I'm feeling pretty good about how I showed up for myself in 2024. 

Here were my 2024 goals:

Spirit

-Set aside 2 minutes at bedtime each night to breathe and do gratitude. 

I actually feel good about this. My streak got ruined in June, but I tried to pick back up and be consistent. Daily gratitude has happened with ease. 

Hobbies

-Visit 1 new restaurant each month. Make a list by January 31. 

I never did make a list, but I definitely tried more than 12 new places! I finally sat down a few weeks ago to write all my Yelp reviews. 

-Take AJ on 1-2 hikes when the weather warms up. Choose locations and schedule the hikes by March 31. 

I did not do this. I didn't make the time to plan anything and was worried AJ wouldn't be able to walk a route, and that I didn't have a pack to carry him in. I got in my head about it and didn't make it happen. 

-Read 5-10 minutes of a paperback book at bedtime. 

I did this a lot and got 10 paperbacks done. Some days I read more than 10 minutes, other days not at all, especially December. It was hard to read while trying to conceive, since I mostly read paperbacks at night.

Love

-Have a weekly check-in with Matthew 

We started off strong with this but didn't really do it weekly. We did do it more often than in 2023 though, so I guess that's good. 

-Go on 1 date each quarter. 

I think we averaged that! We had my mom watch AJ a few times. We did a date for Matthew's birthday, a date for my birthday, had dinner with Matthew's family as a date, and I think we did something else too. 

Reflection

I wanted to do the same reflection from last year, and also wanted to record some Enneagram 1 related things to remind myself of areas I need to focus on personally. 

What am I most grateful for from this year?

  • Our health. No major illnesses or injuries in our household. 
  • General steadiness. The day I was let go from my job, I was thinking how grateful I was for the steadiness and predictability of my life--the general ease and rhythm I was feeling. 
  • AJ. I'm grateful we have him. The growth he inspires in us. The laughter he brings. He's just the light of my life. 
  • General memories. Cornbelly's, zoo trips, pool days, AJ's birthday, going to Logan, etc. 

What were my biggest challenges this year?

  • Oof. Unexpected job loss, absolutely. 
  • Trying to conceive. My early spotting/long periods. 
  • Getting enough sleep due to not being able to put down my phone. 
  • Election year. The division and vitriol. 
  • Not enough vacation/rest. 

What were my biggest wins this year? 

  • Finding a new job within three weeks of losing my previous one. 
  • 365 days of movement, with almost 200 weight lifting sessions. 
  • Achieved my reading goal (63 out of 50 books, including 10 paperbacks).
  • Continued my Duo Lingo Spanish practice streak
  • Finally starting the Fair Play card deck with Matthew
  • Getting through potty training. 
  • Actually making goals to begin with!


Who and what helped me get through the year?

  • Solidarity. People sharing their struggles or saying, "Me too" when I share mine. 
  • Friends. Old friends, new friends, people who care. 
  • Exercise. I will say it every year. It keeps me sane and grounded. 
  • Acupuncture. I did at least three menstrual cycles with acupuncture, and it was awesome. I wish it were cheaper so I could go regularly. I stopped going after I lost my job. 

What were the top three lessons I learned this year?

  1. That I'm still VERY bad at rest and at allowing myself to feel whatever I feel, especially anger. 
  2. Re-learned: That daily gratitude and glimmers make a huge difference in how life feels on any particular day. 
  3. Surrender and timing. Mostly as it relates to fertility or trying to conceive. 

What did I discover about myself this year?

  • That I overwhelm myself with information. The main example is with parenting and parenting books. I've read or listened to too many, and it's hard for me to implement what's best and decide what resonates when I see value in so many approaches. 
  • That I check out. I pick up my phone when a hard thing is happening. I don't like being uncomfortable, mostly emotionally speaking. 

How would I describe the type of person I was this year?

  • A little more reserved than in years past. I hold back some of my thoughts and feelings and only share them with safe people. I mostly share "safe" things publicly. 
  • I feel like I've been just living a surface level life, not really an authentic one. It feels scary to put that into words that other people might read. But without taking the time to express myself authentically anywhere--on a blog, on social media, or with friends in person--I just feel like a shell of myself. 

What type of person do I want to become next year? 

  • A person who knows how to sit in discomfort and hard feelings. 
  • A person who knows how to rest intentionally. 

Now looking at some of the Enneagram posts I've saved: 




1. What rules did I break this year? How did it feel in my body to rebel? 
  • I can only think of one thing, really, and I'm not going to write it here. But it didn't feel good. It felt stressful and dishonest. 
2. How did expressing healthy anger lead to positive outcomes this year? Make a list. 
  • I'm not good at expressing anger or even allowing myself to feel it. I'm wanting to focus on this emotion in particular this year. Recognizing my anger. Allowing my anger. Not letting it build into toxicity in my body, or accumulate into rage and resentment. All this to say, I can't think of how I expressed healthy anger or how it led to positive outcomes. 
  • I like the quote from CS Lewis: I sat with my anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief. 
3. Can you look back and note times this past year where you felt light? Times when you laughed?
  • I think any moment I stopped to appreciate my son or something he was doing. 
  • I laughed with my husband mostly. Otherwise I don't think I laugh enough. 
  • I did a reiki session with my sister in law. I felt great after that. 
4. What systems worked for you this year? What systems do you need to tweak or toss out? 
  • Tweak: I mentioned in a previous blog that I want to tweak my weekly cleaning list to maybe spread the tasks throughout the week so it doesn't dominate my Friday or Saturday. I like having a home that's clean all at once, but I think I'd rather have the time to enjoy my weekend. 
  • Worked: Nightly robovac is the bee's knees.
  • Worked: Splitting and alternating bed and bath time with Matthew is working. 
  • Worked: Morning workouts. I got it done this year and am proud of that. 


2025 Word of the Year


For my "word of the year," I've been going back and forth between "rest" and "feel." I'm now wondering if the word "heal" would encompass both of those. And it seems like a word I can implement daily. I can heal by doing red light, meditation/breathing, journaling or writing, connecting with friends, going to therapy (if my insurance covers it), putting down my phone, going outside, etc. I feel like it would just be a helpful focus for me to find some kind of healing practice each day. 

2025 Goals

I'm still using last year's "Full Focus Assessment" categories as guides because I think they're good and specific. 

Start:

  • Planning two long weekend getaways of some kind. We have a Las Vegas stay to redeem. (spirit, family, love)
    • May 24-26?
    • Aug 30-Sep1? 
  • Spending at least 5 minutes outside each day. (spirit)
  • Using my PTO instead of accumulating it and not resting. (work, spirit)
  • Sitting in my feelings and naming them appropriately. (spirit)
  • Learning about instructional design (work) 
  • Reviewing finances as a couple each month (money, love)
  • Five Senses Journal from Gretchen Rubin (mind, spirit)
  • Weekly meal prep or planning of some kind (body, family)
  • Eating to improve fertility/egg quality (body, family)

Stop: 

  • Bypassing my social media time limits. (spirit, body)
  • Using my phone past 9pm. (spirit, body)

Continue:

  • Paying down the debt on my new floors (money) 
  • Saving for a car, home, and AJ (money) 
  • Reading at bedtime, 1 paperback each month (hobbies)
  • Trying a new restaurant monthly (hobbies)
  • Listening to audiobooks (mind) 
  • Daily breathing practice (spirit)
  • Daily gratitude (spirit)
  • Weekly relationship check-ins (love)
  • Quarterly dates (love)
  • Weight lifting (body)
  • Blogging (family)
  • Planning the summer activities (family)
  • Planning October/fall activities (family)
  • Planning December/holiday activities (family)

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