Janae Says...

Motherhood. There are so many things to say about it. And what hasn’t already been said by someone, somewhere? What can I add that's of any value? I suppose I'll just write what I need to write for my own understanding, whether it adds value to anyone's life or not.  I came across a friend’s Instagram post in which she mentioned that her friend hadn’t been to the movies in several years. She then praised her, describing her as a dedicated mom. Some of you may know my very serious anxiety about being a mother. This is a very real challenge for me mentally and emotionally—a hurdle I need to overcome. It’s incredibly complex, and certainly can’t be described in one blog post or in one conversation. It’s an emotionally charged subject for me and a lot of other people. So I’ll just limit myself to this one topic on this occasion. One of my countless reasons for being so anxious and stressed about motherhood is the kind of situation described on my friend’s Instagram...

Oh, the gym. How I love it. But as I was setting up for my step interval class last Wednesday, I remembered how it wasn’t always so. What is now one of my favorite and most comfortable places to be in, used to cause me enormous amounts of anxiety--especially the classes. It just didn’t make sense to me. Why work out with so many people around you? They’ll look at you funny for getting so sweaty. How do you even use these machines? What is this one for? Will these muscular men be mad at a short little girl for taking one of the free weight benches? People are going to look at you and see that you have no idea what you’re doing. If any of these fears or insecurities have ever crossed your mind, let me squash those for you right now. At a gym, we are all “in the zone.” We are doing our own thing, working toward our own goals. We’re all at different stages on our fitness journey. We all had to start somewhere. There’s not just ONE right way to reach goals, and people who exercise kno...

If you know me well, you know I hate moving. I stayed in the same apartment for all five years I was at BYU. I lived alone in my Murray apartment for two years even though my rent went WAY up the second year. I just signed a lease for my apartment I've been in for two years.  I also have been in my classroom for four years. The principal approached me about switching rooms to the one straight underneath me, which basically meant that it would be the same amount of space, closet room, etc. He later said I didn't have to move, because the teacher who he wanted to take my room didn't want to move.  I decided to go ahead with the move anyway because SMARTBoard. I also think it's good to change even though I hate it. I ended up packing up all my things--professional development books, party supplies, thesauruses, all office supplies like paper, markers, pencils, paper clips, etc. and planned on making the move. This was a horrible nightmare because, althoug...