Saturday, February 26, 2011

Get It ;)

Dinner at The Pie Pizzeria? $20 (for him)

Watching Salt on my comfy couch while cuddling? $10 (for me, 2 for $20 at Blockbuster!)

Ending a two-year kissing drought? Priceless.


Monday, February 21, 2011

Star Mile

Old doubt and a girl by your side
She’s feeding your pride
As you go for a ride
Down the Star Mile

Worlds arise as she lets you come in
A duo begins
To the Hollywood Inn
Of the lonely

And all the gold dust in her eyes won't reform into a ring
You had and lost the one thing
You kept in a safe place
Remember the face
Of the girl who had made you her own
And how you left her alone

All’s well at the base of the hill
You might need to fill
A prescription to kill
Off the silence.

Look down from your tower on high
And take in the night
Look her right in the eye
She’ll listen


Life goes to those that are true
The regular news
Over playing the blues
With the light on

And if you burn the road
That’ll lead you back to her in time
I watch you turn to stone
You can’t find the sunlight

She’s moving on without you
The tide breaks
You watch the stars fade
They gather you back to their home
I guess it’s better than being alone

Friday, February 18, 2011


I am going to be alone forever.


Anytime I allow myself to think differently, I am quickly reminded of how stupid I am.

I always get put back in my place.

"No, Janae. You were being dumb. It's never going to happen for you. Aw, what was that? You hoped for a little while that something might work out? That someone would be truthful and actually follow through in his intention to give you what he says you deserve? That's sweet. How cute of you to let yourself be hopeful."

EFF you, boys.

Eff you all. Seriously.

Monday, February 14, 2011

The Payoff

My kids in Provo last year were much nicer, more appreciative, well behaved, and (insert any other positive adjective here) than my students this year.

I am friends with ONE student on Facebook because she is a lovely, mature, intelligent young woman. She messaged me on Facebook tonight, and I need to commemorate it.

hey ms. balibrea,
i know that i'm not your student this year and that i don't have the right to bother you with questions anymore but i figure one question won't hurt right? ok well, i'm taking honors this year and so a lot of times we end up having to learn things really fast because a lot of the other honor students know what we're learning already so that is kinda what happened to me this time and i was wondering if you could give me a little extra help with something i didn't really get.

i need a little help with how to write specific and vivid figurative phrases. i don't know why but it has been so hard for me to understand the concept and my head isn't getting it. ok well that's all, i hope you don't mind me still asking questions. i just know that if anyone can help me understand it , it would be you :)


OK, that last line? She is a girl after my own heart. Seriously? How cute is she. I responded, trying to be as helpful as I could within a few paragraphs. She answered back:

THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH!!! you don't know how much i love you for this, you are so sweet. i had already tried asking my teacher but she didn't help as much as you ;) she is a good teacher and she excepts a lot from us which gets us working, but even though she's been been teaching for 15+ years i think you taught us better on your first year, i mean it. thanks again.

I don't think I'll cheapen this with words. I hope every teacher gets several of this type of student in their lifetime.

#3: Check

So since I got flowers for my birthday, and since I'm so used to celebrating my birthday and Valentine's Day together in any relationship I've been in... I was not expecting anything at all today.

I felt a little sad that I wouldn't get to spend Valentine's Day with someone special, and I also felt sad that nothing would make this day different from every other day.

But he said that we'd celebrate later on in the week.

And really, like I said, I didn't expect anything at all except maybe a cute text message or something.

So you can imagine my surprise when in the middle of my 3A, the secretary walks in with these...

Spoiled much?

As far as #3 goes in my last post--feeling praised and appreciated?--this boy's got it down. 

Sunday, February 13, 2011

My "Type" Revised!

(Before I get into the actual meat of my post, I wanted to make a list of all that I have to do and have done this weekend):

- A roots quiz (x140)
- A commonly confused words quiz (x140)
- A worksheet for II.3-4 of Romeo and Juliet (x140)
- A worksheet for II.5-6 of Romeo and Juliet (x140)
- A word families worksheet (x30)
- Late work

*Lesson plans for the 15th/16th and 17th/22nd (and I have a sub on the 17th => lesson plans are more difficult to do because they're more detailed)

*Read a chapter in my comprehension book and do a page of discussion notes on it

All of the above items have been accomplished.

Come tomorrow, I have to
- Grade all of the A classes' journals that come in
- Grade 2B journals because I didn't on Friday
- Grade any reading logs that come in
- Grade any late work that comes in
- Print off my lesson plans
- Make copies for those lesson plans

All of the grading needs to be done by 5 PM. Awesome, huh? I'm very fast at grading journals, so I think I'll be OK. But I'm still really stressed.

Also, I went to Buca di Beppo with Rachel last night. It was so yummy. We went to Target after where I ventured into the realm of red lipstick. Rachel told me last night how I should do it, and I also researched on Google today about how to wear red lipstick--minimizing all the other makeup because light eyes naturally pop with the lipstick and dark hair. So I did my hair fun and wore a polka dot dress today.

I also got some new blush, and a dress that was on clearance for $10. I would have waited on it, but it was the only one like it and it was on clearance. I have something to exchange at Target and would've loved to have just used that as store credit, but seriously folks... I just couldn't take a risk on that dress... I mean, look at it!

I know, right? I will go back tomorrow to get the cinch belt and cardigan that Rachel helped me pick out for it--with my exchanged credit! I am excited. I never buy new clothes, especially ones I can wear to church. So yeah. I did all that grading and STILL managed to have fun with Rachel yesterday. The lesson plans and homework were done today.

But now to the real purpose of this post...

It seems on the Sundays where I least want to go to church, those are the best ones. I think that's the case for most people.

Valentine's Day is tomorrow, and there were four speakers in sacrament today. Three of the four were noteworthy. Two speakers were male and two female; one of each was engaged.. Seriously, I really enjoyed the talks. Two of them were on "What Women Want," and the other was basically the same but he took it more in the direction of what they deserve. It was very sweet. The first speaker is the one I wanted to talk about in my post...

She gave several disclaimers, including that no girl wants the exact same thing in a guy, that we don't even know what we want, and that we reserve the right to change our minds at any given moment without notice. She was very funny and well-spoken. She got into the three things she believes any LDS girl would want in a man. And I can attest to these three things.

1. A man who acts (who has initiative, is a go-getter).

2. A man who is a strong priesthood holder and leader

3. A man who praises and appreciates women

*On the first point, she mentioned the 3 Ps of dating as outlined by a general authority. Dates should be 1) planned ahead, 2) paid for, and 3) paired off. I do not like going on a (first, second, third, or important romantic) date where I am being asked what I want to do. What? You asked me on a date. You were supposed to plan it. If I asked you, I'd plan it. Come on! That shows me that you put no thought into this. Dates do not have to be expensive or extravagant, but they should be planned! I think someone who has initiative or who "acts," so to speak, would easily accomplish the first of these 3 Ps.

I could talk about the second P of dating for a long time. Basically, I'm sick of guys complaining that they have to pay. That is YOUR responsibility if you did the asking. It's gentlemanly. And no, your dates aren't always going to get you somewhere. But you have to think of it as an investment, not a waste. Just because you've been disillusioned by every girl you've taken out before me doesn't mean I'm the one who should get gypped! Seriously? I'm not high maintenance, but don't be cheap.

Paired off needs no expounding. We're too big to do group dates, folks. Let's be big kids and ask each other on dates and go out. And you know what I mean: GO OUT, not HANG out.

On top of all of these 3 Ps, a man with initiative makes decisions and goes after those things. Sooner is better than later, might I add. Laziness or indecisiveness is a huge turn off. So I'm definitely with the first lady speaker on point number one. I do want a go-getter man of action.

**As for the second point, I think this should have been number one. Having lived a life without a priesthood holder in my house, this is not an option. I'd rather marry a friend who has the priesthood than a lover who doesn't. My needs and the needs of my family will not be met if I do not have a priesthood holder in my home. Not only a priesthood holder, but a man who understands, lives up to, and appreciates the amazing power and opportunity he has to bless so many lives. I LOVE the priesthood. I NEED the priesthood. I can't do anything in my life that matters without it. I can't repent properly, take the sacrament, go to the temple, get married there, receive priesthood blessings, be sealed to my kids, do family history, anything!--without the priesthood. Thank you, Zannah, for mentioning this.

I also think a worthy priesthood holder who is spiritual and close to the Lord will know how to lead his family to salvation and happiness. He would not abuse his "power," but instead would choose to lead with charity and humility. Another speaker mentioned that priesthood leader would lead with "honor, tenderness, and love." I think if this is the case, the third point follows pretty easily.

***The third point is true but its delivery is different for everyone. It is amazing to feel praised, loved, adored, and appreciated. For me, a text, message, letter, random note, whatever will do the trick. But I also feel appreciated and adored when a boy spends time with me. A LOT of time. This is where I'm hard to please. :) I love receiving flowers and random thoughtful things. That makes me feel appreciated too. I love receiving help or "acts of service," as they might be called, when I need it. Hugs and kisses do make me feel adored, but it doesn't go much further than that. I feel like we can say we want to be praised and appreciated, but it's more helpful to know how we feel those things most effectively.

One speaker mentioned that it is an honor and a privilege to be able to date one of Heavenly Father's daughters. I think a priesthood holder (point #2) would be mindful of this and would make that much more effort on point #3. A real man shows his wife that he loves and appreciates her, and that he sees her the way Heavenly Father does. He lets his kids see that tenderness that he feels for their mother and always speaks to her respectfully. He also helps her with anything, seeing his wife as a partner and teammate and not as lesser. In fact, he should probably see himself as standing in need of her, and the skills, comforts, and happiness that she brings to his life. Behind every great man is a great woman. A priesthood holder should know this.

I feel like this whole blog post was a scattered mess. Oh well. I just have a lot to say. High demands, too. But partly because I have a lot to offer! So it's fair, right?

I love church.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Lucky 24!

The festivities began on Monday with a birthday dinner from my grandma and family.

She made chicken broccoli casserole and bought me a delicious red velvet cake from Nothing Bundt Cakes.  Among the presents I got were: a box of Emergen-C, a cute mug, a stuffed wiener dog, a bag of Hershey's milk chocolate hearts, a bag of Reese's peanut butter eggs, a big Hershey caramel bar, a cute shirt (I've worn it twice this week already), a cute pot of purple flowers, and a George Foreman grill. She also got me a cute balloon. Uncle Dave and Aunt Jess got me some Bath & Body Works products :)

Here are some photos.

I got some birthday cards starting a couple days ago. From Grandpa Mike, Carmen, and my mom, plus my grandma on Sunday, and Rachel's early Valentine's card. :)

On my actual birthday I started the day off with a text from Sydnie telling me happy birthday, and some other really sweet stuff. I got several more texts throughout the day from such people as Kristina, Emily, and phone calls from my parents and Carmen.

I went to school and had some students remember to tell me happy birthday first thing in the morning.

I had already started to have the Facebook wall posts roll in... I've ended up with about 50 and probably will get a couple more before the night is over. Awesome huh!

My 1A class sang "Happy Birthday" to me, while I turned bright red over it for some reason. It was really awful. haha. Like, the sound of their out of tune voices was awful. But it was way cute.

I got a phone call from my mom's cell phone. It was my brother Jason wishing me a happy birthday!

Then in 2A, my prep period, a kid comes in with a vase of beautiful bright orange flowers. He said they were from the secretary, Mrs. Woodruff, and "Happy Birthday." I was really confused.

 Then I looked at the card, and everything made sense.

Pretty much everyone should have a boy as cute as mine.

My 3A was pretty boring but well behaved, mostly.

My 4A was uneventful. I asked one of my students where my birthday flowers were. He has an ongoing feud with my outside of school love interest and is rather jealous of him. haha.

After school some students came to wish me a happy birthday. One of them came running around the corner into my no-access desk zone, wrapped his arms around me, picked me up and started flailing me around, telling me happy birthday over and over again! I was totally stiff and awkward and kept telling him to put me down. Wow. Not sure what to do with that.

Anyways. I came home and had to go to the office because my apartments had called saying they received a perishable package for me. Mom sent me these:

Yeah, are those beautiful or what?! I ate one, obviously... There were 4 cookies too--(two) chocolate chip, macadamia nut, and oatmeal raisin, dipped in chocolate!

I cleaned my house because I wasn't sure what kinds of festivities might go down after dinner. Nothing really did, but it's nice to have a clean place that smells good.

Rachel came to pick me up for dinner. She bought me a new spatula--it's red and awesome!, some recipe cards, a coupon organizer, a Red Mango gift card!,

 aaaaand she made me delicious treats. If she weren't into so many different things and not so multi-talented, I'd say she should just become a baker. Because seriously?

Who does that? Come on.

We went to dinner where Dan and Brianne had already arrived. Brianne got me a subscription to the Rolling Stone--which I have received three of this week! Loving it big time.

Dan got me this, unexpectedly:

$25! Wow, Dan. He said it was because he knew I wouldn't let him buy me dinner, so that way I had no choice. This entitled me to more than just a burger--I got a single order of onion rings, and a chocolate shake in addition to my burger. Yes, I was about to explode. Almost in Rachel's car. But I didn't! Too bad I'm so full because I really want one of her cupcakes!

Cutest Cara brought me a card and these:

Audrey came with a cute bag of Hershey kisses and MAC lip gloss!


Then Marla and Paigey came fashionably late. With these...

SIX cupcakes from the Cocoa Bean. Seriously, Marla? Are you freaking kidding me? Is this?: A. The way to my heart. B. The way to my obesity. C. All of the above.

Ding ding ding! C is the correct response.

I forgot to get a picture before Dan and Cara had already left. But this one turned out good. My tangled hair on my collar bone is really annoying me in this picture, but it's just so dang CUTE of everyone I can't help but love it.

After dinner Rachel came over, and we watched Inkheart. I know, I know. But I really love the idea of it, and Paul Bettany is really hot in it it entertains me. 

The only thing that could make this day end 110% well is if someone doesn't have to work late and calls me after work... It's about that time where I'm thinking that won't be the case. But it is A-OK, because I am so loved and soooo spoiled.

LOVED this birthday!

Monday, February 7, 2011

Jason S.

I think it's really weird that I find Jason Schwartzman attractive.

You can judge me if you want. I already judge myself.

I especially adore how he looks like a Beatle in this picture. I mean, how cute is that?

There's something amazingly cool about this kid who was in Rushmore, formed the band Phantom Planet, and who makes me giggle uncontrollably.

I just watched I Heart Huckabees. It's been on my queue for a while now. I had no idea that Jason S. starred in it. It made it that much better. (Also the fact that I had Video on Demand dollars on Amazon and watched it for free, made it that much better).

What made it perhaps the greatest part of my week (Thursday has yet to pass, for it's my day of birth) was the strip underneath the movie... "Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought..."

Feel free to click on it and blow up that bad boy.

Does it look like my taste is consistent to anyone? Hm? Dost thou see Garden State and Eternal Sunshine on this list? Adaptation? Science of Sleep? I guess the next two movies on my list are The Dareeling Limited and The Squid and the Whale. Actually, the former was already on my list.

Just sayin'.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

My "Type"?

I was reading a friend's blog recently, where he was explicating why he would like to find a Hermione-type girl. He gave reasons he would not pursue a Bella-type girl. I've never read the Twilight books, so I'm going only by film in this comparison, but I can't believe that was even a question amongst males. I guess I can understand that they'd want the needy helpless totally unfeminist girl. It makes more sense when I think of it that way.

Now I'm trying to think of a character in a book or movie who would be considered "my type."

At first I had nothing. But right when I typed that last sentence, two characters came to mind. One is Joel from Eternal Sunshine, and the other is Jesse from Before Sunrise (or Sunset).

Joel is boring. He is realistic. He has his crap together. Really, I think he'd be even too boring for me. He's not a go-getter and is probably the ultimate white personality. He also isn't very verbal or communicative (more white for ya). There would be problems, but he's not some unsung hero. He won't come riding in on a horse and smell like Old Spice. I like that. Most importantly, he is willing to take a chance on someone knowing that he might get hurt, and knowing their faults. He accepts the risk with a simple, "OK." Yes Joel, I'll take thee at thy word.

Jesse... Oh, Jesse. How I love that you are romantic enough to travel anywhere to see a woman you care about. And how I love that you are not unrealistic in the sense that you left all your hope in things that could have been; he moves on and takes life's jabs. He goes into situations with a measured amount of vulnerability--just enough to get to experience things, but not enough to get hurt. He is also very articulate and communicative, verbally and in writing. He wrote a book in the sequel, remember? His cynicism wanes as he gets older, but not his realism.

I don't see any ultra strong, diamond sparkly, blood-sucking heroes in my future. I don't see anyone writing me poetry (but that would be amazing). I don't see someone writing me a letter every day for a year without response (Nicholas Sparks, could you be more ridiculous?). I don't see someone serenading me in the bleachers of a school. And I don't see anyone with huge muscles or model looks. I don't see a master chef who creates candlelit dinners and enjoys walks on the beach. Nor do I see a man's man who brings down enormous game and lives at Cabela's.

I haven't pinpointed my type yet, but I think I've got a good idea of what is not my type. :)

Friday, February 4, 2011


Being sick is boring. I have two classes' worth of worksheets I can grade. But what have I done today?

I've eaten (Cream of Wheat, a smoothie, soup and crackers, chocolate cake).

I've had tea, naproxen, and Airborne. 

I've slept (not a lot, only 5 hours through the night and less than 3 a little bit ago).

I've watched TV (Price is Right, The Fast and the Furious, Where the Wild Things Are, A Beautiful Mind).

I returned a RedBox movie and got more tea at the store.

Booooriiiiing... Two more weeks till I go home.

I WILL say that lying in bed sleeping is so much more gratifying on a Friday when I should be at work than on a Saturday when I don't have to be anywhere.


Someday, when I retire, I will spend every morning eating an optimal fiber breakfast...


and watching The Price is Right.

P.S. Does anyone else think it's funny how all of the commercials during the show are geared toward old people? Makes me think I have no business enjoying this show. But I've been watching it since I was in 5th grade. I can't help but love it.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Wish List

Things I want...

A cheap full-length mirror for my bedroom
A basket to put fruits/veggies in
New exercise clothes
A new copy of Garden State :'(
A keyboard (a piano, really, but I try to dream realistically)
Someone who says they'll do something, and then does it

Most of these are attainable, methinks.


Woke up at 7:24 this morning instead of 6:15 due to yet another alarm clock fail. I am going to exchange that piece of .... at Best Buy in a few days. I made it to work at 7:50, and I live 20 minutes away. That should tell you how awesome I am.

Fortunately, I have a substitute for tomorrow because I am not feeling well. Last night and the night before I got 9 hours of sleep! And I still am feeling yucky. Throat and nose kind of yucky.

Not to worry, I have plenty of soup and crackers and a nice comfy couch for tomorrow. Plus no concern with my alarm not going off at the right time. 

In teacher news...

My 3B makes reading Shakespeare into torture. I feel like I'm being stabbed in the gullet along with them. They can't appreciate it, no matter how hard I try.

But my 4B! They LOVE Romeo and Juliet. They're eating it up and understanding it so amazingly well.

And today, I felt I could really relate with some of what was being said in the balcony scene. When Juliet is concerned regarding how easily Romeo has won her:

O gentle Romeo,
If thou dost love, pronounce it faithfully:
Or if thou think'st I am too quickly won,
I'll frown and be perverse an say thee nay,
So thou wilt woo; but else, not for the world.
In truth, fair Montague, I am too fond,
And therefore thou mayst think my 'havior light:
But trust me, gentleman, I'll prove more true
Than those that have more cunning to be strange.
I should have been more strange, I must confess,
But that thou overheard'st, ere I was ware,
My true love's passion: therefore pardon me,
And not impute this yielding to light love,
Which the dark night hath so discovered.

I also related with the danger Romeo feels regarding love: 

Alack, there lies more peril in thine eye
Than twenty of their swords: look thou but sweet,
And I am proof against their enmity.

Peril in someone's eyes, more than twenty of their swords? Amen, Romeo. You know how to say it. As shallow as I may deem 13-year old Juliet and umpteen-year old Romeo, the feelings they feel exist in real life. I wish I could explain this to my classes in a simultaneously candid and comfortable way.

Really, though. Hope and want = danger.

Therefore, I am running away from it.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Hey Neighbors

Dear New Neighbors Below Me,

Thanks for choosing to hammer the shiz out of your wall while I was sleeping last night.

I also enjoyed those drilling sounds.

It only took me 20 minutes to fall back asleep.

By the way, did my really loud music at 6 AM while I was showering wake you up? I hope so.

Your Sleepy Neighbor