Janae Says...

I booked my massage for last night about five or six weeks ago. I did this in person at the desk and wanted it to be right after my half marathon, but my therapist wasn’t available soon enough. So I went ahead and booked for six days after my race. I showed up to the massage place last night at 5:25pm for a 5:30 appointment, right on time. The lady at the front desk, Julie, said, “Oh you are early,” and said it in a way like she was hoping I would be. I gave her a slightly confused smile and nod. Sure. A whole five minutes early. By 5:35 my massage therapist still hadn’t come to get me. I asked the front desk if Jennica was running behind, or what the issue was. The other lady got up to go check, and said that she was in the middle of a massage, and that it would be done at 6. I was confused. My appointment was at 5:30. An obnoxious back and forth occurred between me and the two women at the desk, where we came to an understanding about the following: I was s...

And so my race has come and gone. I was so much more relaxed this time. I got all my stuff ready the night before. Having trained for a marathon last year and doing the 12, 14, 16, 18 mile distances on a weekly basis, 13.1 isn’t anything that gave me anxiety this time around. The freeway exit was a huge mess, as always. It’s only one right turn lane into two lanes heading west. As I passed the first turn (Ashton Blvd), a white minivan skipped that light and went straight through it even though he was in a left turn lane. Seeing this after my last near accident, I laid on my horn and swerved to the right because I anticipated he’d try to get into my lane (since he was going the wrong direction). As I spun my wheel, I spilled my pre-workout collagen mixture all over myself. It got all over my driver’s seat and made it look like I wet my pants. So that super upset me before my race. Definitely wasn’t how I wanted things to get started. I got over it, figuring the other runners w...

I probably shouldn’t let my race pass by tomorrow without doing a post about my training season. I've almost always done these posts either before or shortly after every race I've done.  Just to recap, I ran the { Provo Half in 2013 }. I skipped 2014. I ran the { Alpine Classic in 2015 }. This was uphill, and I beat my time by a lot! I ran the Fantasy Run at Gardner Village in 2016. It was 0.3 miles short. I was ticked. I needed to know my new PR. Looks like I didn't even write about it besides { this post } which you can see if we're Facebook friends. I was going to do the Alpine Classic again in 2017, but it was canceled with only two weeks left of training, so I ran my own 13.1 on the Jordan River Parkway. I ran the { South Jordan full marathon } in October 2017. And I’m running the Thankful 13 half tomorrow morning at 8am. This training season has been different from the rest of any I’ve had. The colde...

This morning I almost got into an accident on the freeway. I was in the left of the two right lines getting onto the 15 N from the 215 W. Someone decided to come into my lane and not check his blind spot. I didn’t even have time to honk when I saw it happening. I quickly looked right and made sure it was clear. I turned to the right way too hard. Then I had to correct it, and at 65mph, this doesn’t go incredibly smoothly. So when I tried to correct it, my car ended up on the left two wheels, then on the right two wheels. I rocked from side to side going around 60mph getting onto a freeway on ramp. All because someone didn’t check his blind spot. I am so, so grateful I was able to correct my car. I could’ve rolled over. I could’ve hit someone to my right. Someone could’ve hit me from behind as I tried to correct myself. So many different outcomes could’ve happened. I was really shaken up on the rest of my drive to work, but was mostly calmed down by the time I got there, just overco...

Today I want to talk about tinnitus. It sucks. Everyone has experienced it to some degree. But I’ve learned that it doesn’t sound the same for everyone. You know that high pitched whistle you get in your ear that comes and goes pretty quickly? Some people have that all the time. I still get those small occurrences of whistling. They come and go just as they always have. But my lasting tinnitus doesn’t sound like that whistle we’ve all heard. It’s very hard to explain. And I sympathize with those who struggle with chronic pain or other invisible issues because when others can’t see it, it makes you feel like maybe you’re crazy. If you can’t explain it, maybe it isn’t really happening. Maybe you are making things up. But I tell you my friends, this noise in my head is real; I know when it is there and when it isn’t. I'm no hypochondriac and tend to downplay pain or discomfort. So when I say this is legit, I mean it. I had a couple of instances earlier this yea...

I want to write like Dawn Meehan . She wrote an amazing eBay description that went viral many years ago. It was about what it’s like to grocery shop with six kids, and how she ended up with Pokemon cards in her cart. She’s recently picked up blogging again, and I love to read her work. She makes me laugh. She sees the humor in every situation, and a lot of her humor is at her own expense. Embarrassing moments make great writing, when done right. She gets really fired up about a lot of things, like why she hasn’t found a church to attend in Florida, or a certain bird that wakes her up in the middle of the night, or what it’s like to be an Uber driver. I find her wildly entertaining, and I love her voice more than probably any other blogger I’ve followed. I had this memory pop up on Facebook yesterday: So many of my favorite things I’ve written have been rants. Like this one about the awful massage I had. Or this one about the grocery carts. Or this one ...

I have a little “question a day” journal that my grandma got me. I’m excited to have it completed in five years, just to see how my answers change. But last night’s question was, “who is your idol?” I wrote that Gretchen Rubin was my idol because she totally switched careers to writing from law, even though she was scared to do it. And that she isn’t afraid to challenge herself and try new things (starting a blog, doing a podcast, etc.). I appreciate that she likes to share her findings with the world to help people lead better, happier lives. I’ve used her tools in helping my own clients (and students, when I taught). I feel like success is easier to achieve when we know ourselves better. Her Four Tendencies framework along with all of her “know yourself better” segments on her podcast are such great tools for self-knowledge and self-acceptance. How can you become better if you don’t thoroughly understand the ways in which you struggle, and why those things are a struggle? ...

I feel like I have an endless list of things I wish I knew more about. There are a few people who, when I think about the knowledge they have on certain topics, and the experience they have on top of that, I just wish I could cut open my skull and have them pour their brains into mine. That sounds so gross. But you know what I mean. I love all things self-help. I love to learn about relationships and parenting, and methods, techniques, and strategies to make those relationships healthier and more functional. For that I follow @knowhowmomtips on Instagram, a woman I deeply admire for her strength, knowledge, and experience. I seriously wish I could have her brain poured into mine. I love to hear about astrology and patterns that people experience. I’m fascinated when people mention Mercury in retrograde, and the full moon, and all the things that I have no idea about. I would love if my friend Kevin Goldberg could just instantly upload his knowledge into my brain. Astronom...

Lately I’ve been feeling a little bit like any “dreams” I have are on hold. I’ve never considered myself much of a dreamer anyway. I guess I have always been satisfied with the notion of a steady, emotionally fulfilling life: a husband, kids, a dog, vacations. I don’t need the big mansion on the beach, and it definitely wouldn’t be as fun to live in it alone. So while I never thought I was “one of those BYU girls” who came to school specifically to get married and have babies, I guess in actuality, that really was all I’ve wanted my entire life. I got engaged at 21, and went on and off with him for another 5-7 months after we broke it off. Then I had a long stint of learning how to be happy just doing the things I enjoy doing. And I feel I’ve done a really good job of that. I’ve worked and supported myself and traveled and challenged myself, all without a husband. Another long relationship followed when I was 26 all the way up until age 31.5. We broke off the engagement whe...

I came across one of the billions of inspirational messages on Instagram a couple of months ago. It says: You can't hate yourself happy. You can't criticize yourself thin. You can't shame yourself wealthy. Real change begins with  self-love and self-care.  I'm having a lot of feelings about this today. This morning, I went into the depths of Facebook and searched for old photos of myself to use as "before" pictures on any transformation posts I might do in the future. The search made me unexpectedly emotional. I am about 20 pounds under my heaviest weight at the moment. But honestly, the initial changes I made to my health weren't about weight loss. It was just about making better choices for myself. It was in 2011 or 2012 that I started shopping a little bit differently, bringing salad supplies to work instead of Michelina's frozen meals. I started checking into the gym on Facebook after work. I'd use time on the elliptical to do ...

I started faithfully tracking my food/macros again on March 10. My weight had gone up after a cleanse, and I knew what I needed to do. It was honestly like a lightning bolt moment as I was sitting in a Daymond John coaching seminar on a Saturday morning. I just knew I needed to make a change, and I committed in that moment to do whatever it would take. I texted my friend Kelsey and asked her to coach me. And here we are almost 9 months later, still going strong. Progress has been slow, slow, slow. Like, so slow. Like I have lost 10 pounds in 9 months slow. Slower than I expected or anticipated. I had hoped I would reach my goal before summer ended; I wanted to confidently wear a bikini. No such luck. But here’s the thing: I put myself in a very different place mentally for this cut. I’ve had built-in treat meals every Saturday, which honestly is pretty frequent given the fact that I haven’t been in a drastic (show prep) cut. But these meals have contributed to my sanity and ...

I try to live my life with intention. Drifting through days, weeks, months, and seasons leaves you looking back wondering, “What did I do with my summer?” “How is it already winter?” So I try to be very purposeful about filling my spare time with things and people I love. In October, I did a LOT of good stuff. I took evening walks while the weather still allowed. Utah has some amazing sunsets: (Sorry about the gross equipment in the foreground) We drove up Big Cottonwood canyon to see if we could catch some fall colors. I went to HAWAII from 10/3-10/9. I went to Cornbelly’s several times (once with the fam, once with mom, three times with Danny, and once alone). I love this sunset picture. I made lunch for 2.5 weeks for myself and one of the owners of the company I work at. He was wanting to feel better and prepare for a touch football game he was going to play. I took down my gym so Ashleigh could move ...