Janae Says...

When I was a little girl, probably in third grade or so, I had pretty bad anxiety. I was a homebody. I was the kid who called her mom to come get her from sleepovers. I just wanted to go home. Our nanny, Carmen, would sometimes take my brothers and me to her home in La Puente. Going to Carmen’s house made me anxious. It wasn’t actually about her or her house; it was that I was anxious and wanted to be at home.  One day, I got really brave and asked Carmen if I could talk to her. But as a child, I didn’t have the vocabulary or understanding to explain my anxious feelings to Carmen. So instead, it came out of my mouth to the effect of, “I don’t want to go to your house anymore.” I remember that day so vividly because I had hurt her feelings. I made her cry. I made sweet, sweet Carmen cry. 27 years later, and I still feel awful about it. I’m not sure I ever apologized to her for it. But I know she forgave me, and I know that’s the lesson I need to walk away with.  What to say abo...

Good AJ . Always AJ. I feel like he learns a new word or two every day. He's so funny, like socially funny. He's such a trooper in all the ways--on walks, on errands, when his grandmas are watching him. He laughs so often. He's giving these tight hugs lately, with his arm wrapped around our neck. He squeezes, and I never let go first. Work . It's not as consistent as I would like, just because of the nature of needing to be trained before I can create trainings. But things come together, and everyone is really happy with it, which is so satisfying to me. Mornings . Matthew has agreed to take the monitor and the morning twice a week so I can run or do whatever. Of course AJ slept later for him both times this past week. (we had a solid three weeks of him waking up around 5:30 for me). But it was nice to get out for a run. Running . I ran on August 31 and August 26. I am not fast. I am way slower than I have been in many years. But just trying to enjoy the process and be ...

August 1 up at 6:00. Went on a walk. Worked. Stopped at Cookie Co. Made AJ’s dinner. Mom watched him and did bedtime while we went to a Bees game. Posted my July blogs.  August 2 AJ woke up at 5:40. I did leg day. I went to get blood taken for a full thyroid panel. I got a couple calls from daycares. I got home and spent some time with my baby. We did dinner time and bedtime while Matthew was at work. I watched Gilmore girls.  August 3 we were up at 6:10 and went on a walk. I worked from home which was really challenging this day. I went to tour a home in West Jordan, but got a text later that day that it was under contract. I did dinner and bedtime and all of the nighttime stuff since Matthew was working. August 4 we were up at 6:00 and went on a walk. I worked from 9 to 2. I took AJ with me to get my emissions and registration done, and we toured two daycares. My heart broke when I saw a nine week old in daycare. It made me so grateful for the support that I have. I picked u...