10.10.2020: The Wedding
It's time to recap our wedding weekend before the details
become a blur!
I was up bright and early on Thursday morning for a run, unsure of how inactive I would be that day on a plane and in a car rental. I got to Matthew's about 7am. His cousin Jim drove us to the airport. We used the fancy new machines that print the bag tag and dropped them off. Then we ventured through the new airport security. It was a nightmare. It took forever. I forgot to pull my liquids out of my bag. Matthew's bag got checked. It took forever. And we didn't know how long it would take us to get to the terminal. It was a 15-20 minute walk through the airport to the old gates from the new security area. We were both very frustrated. We only had about ten minutes at our gate before boarding. We were wearing our "Bride to be" and "Groom to be" sashes that Ashleigh Haren got us. We got lots of congratulations, which was so nice. (Note: we had to take our sashes off at security. Because?)
Our flight was fine. We were super hungry when we landed. We got our rental car at Avis. It was so weird trying to drive out of there. They have a "windows up" policy for their agent, but I needed to talk to the agent to see what she needed me to show her. It was super frustrating and stupid. Anyway, we drove to Farmer Boys and ate breakfast in the car.
From there, we headed to the Honda Center in Anaheim to get our marriage license. They called us, but I didn't recognize the area code. When we called back, she asked if I had a check or money order, so that was frustrating. We had to drive over to 7-11 for a money order, use the ATM there, and pay a fee for the money order. So weird. What year is it?
I was surprised to see all the couples in wedding outfits in the parking lot. Like actually getting married at the Honda Center. Super grateful for my beach wedding after seeing that option.
From there, we took some selfies and drove home to Glendora. We hung out with my dad for a couple of hours. We got some food at Ahipoki. It was yummy, and just what I wanted. Pattee texted me around 3:30 to let me know she could do my nails earlier. I touched base with my mom, who still hadn't left Hesperia to come get me for the nail appointment; she was going to get her nails done too. Oh well. Matthew left for his bachelor party stuff, and my dad took me to Pattee's to get my nails done.
Pattee did my nails and toenails. My dad picked me back up.
We hung out at home, and Shivani came over later that night with Michael and Elayna. We chatted and reminisced. It was fun. My mom also arrived that night.
The next morning, I got up and did a run and a workout; I needed to keep my sanity. I got ready, and Matthew came to pick me up. I made sure to let my chronically tardy mom know (a million times) to be at the beach by 12:30pm. Sweet Matthew calmly showed me in the car that there was animal fur all woven throughout my staticky dress. We picked up the donuts, stopped at Kevin’s (where Matthew grabbed me a lint roller), and headed to Victoria Beach to meet up with Rick (Matthew's dad).
We timed the walk down the stairs and picked the spot we would be at. My mom didn't show up to the beach, but it worked out fine. She was in the area when we were pretty much done running through the plan with Rick. So we got back to the car and headed up PCH to my hotel: Seaside Laguna Inn & Suites. Mom met us there.
Matthew transferred the donuts and other decorations for the evening into his dad's car. Matthew headed to our hotel in Newport. Mom and I went and got Taco Bell. Then we checked in to the hotel and got ready for the evening. Shivani also checked in to her hotel across the street. We left for the party around 4:30pm and drove on toll roads to Corona.
When we arrived, we weren’t sure where to turn down the orchard road. We accidentally turned up to the left, then tried to come back down the hill. But the gate was locked, so I had to reverse my car back up a narrow, scary hill. With mom and Shivani’s help, we made it. When we finally got to the right place, I felt like I just jumped in and didn’t really have time to absorb everything. But man, I was so impressed. Lights were strung up. My donut wall was set up. Photos were out. It was beautiful.
It was super breezy there, and way colder than I expected. But I danced, so it was fine. The group all seemed to divide—my family to the left, and Matthew’s to the right. It was so fun to see everyone start trickling in. I love that so many people came out for me.
There ended up being more of a program than I anticipated. Stephanie had asked Shivani, my parents, and my brother Jason to speak, along with Matthew’s parents and his brother Stanley. We did a dance as a couple, as father and daughter, and as mother and son. Matthew was the star of the show with his dancing. I love him so much.
Matthew and I danced to “You Got What I Need” by Joshua Radin. He did lots of spins and dips, of course. My dad and I danced to “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole. My dad got emotional. I’m not sure of the song Matthew and his mom danced to.
We left the party around 10 and drove back to the hotel. I had emphasized to my mom on Friday that I hadn’t asked her for much of anything in this wedding planning process, and that the only thing I wanted was Sidecar Donuts and a coffee. As silly as it was, it was important to me!
I didn’t sleep well on Friday night. I couldn’t figure out how to turn the temperature up on my air conditioner, so I was freezing. I was up early and went for a two-mile run down PCH. It was beautiful and glorious, but also very hilly. I wrecked my legs, but not badly enough to ruin my wedding day, thankfully.
Shivani came over to my room around 9. I had showered and gotten breakfast from the hotel; it was free, and I was curious what it was (just a banana, yogurt, some kind of bread, all carbs). Shivani and I talked and talked. We could hear my mom arriving because we heard some kind of yelling and cursing outside of my hotel door. Mom had dropped and spilled Shivani’s coffee. Thankfully my coffee and donuts survived. She apologized profusely to Shivani, who reassured her that it was fine.
Emmalee, Matthew’s cousin, arrived at 9:30am to do my hair and makeup. She used false eyelashes which looked great, but by the end of the day my eyes were red and totally wrecked from those and also contacts.
Stephanie arrived and took photos of my dress, of me, and of me and Shivani. My dad arrived early as well and was hanging out in my mom’s room just waiting.
It seemed like the morning was really slow up until the moment we needed to be somewhere. Since my makeup and hair took longer than expected, I felt like I was scrambling to remember all the things. Which of my things needed to go in which car, what I needed to give to Shivani, etc. Jacque arrived with the flowers so that we could take our “first look” photos behind the hotel. I realized at that point that I hadn’t opened my gift from my mom or my gift from Matthew, but I couldn’t do that with photos until I was ready anyway!
Shivani gave me a little purse with “something old (my mom’s rings), something new (should’ve been from Matthew), something borrowed (her sparkly brooch or hair clip), and something blue.” She also got me the traditional coin to put in my shoes, if I were to wear shoes. And also a coral colored tie to “tie everything together.” She also got me a hanky that said, “Keep your shit together.” It was so sweet.
My gift from Matthew was a shirt and also Mr. and Mrs. hats. We didn’t even think to wear them over the next couple days, but we did wear bride and groom masks, which Shivani also supplied for us.
I also gave my mom a gift: a necklace. I think she liked it.
Anyway, we successfully got everything loaded into the car—a combination of our car rental and my mom’s car. Sadly, my Sidecar Donuts got put into my mom’s car, so I didn’t get to have them after the wedding.
From all the shuffling and coordinating and trying to find my dad’s gift in my supplies, along with trying to get the flowers on, and realizing it was a lot later than I had expected, I was told to go to the end of the hallway and wait to be told to come down for the First Look photos with Matthew.
I felt like I waited forever at that door. It was a back door between levels of the hotel. I called out to Shivani to tell her to hurry to get herself and my mom to the beach so they’d have enough time to park and walk down. Finally, Jason and Stephanie they called me to come down. Matthew was turned around and waiting for me.
When I tapped on his shoulder for him to turn around, he started crying. We hugged and kissed and talked. He of course told me how beautiful I was. It was a sweet moment.
After that, Matthew, Jason, Jim, and Kevin headed over to the beach to get there before me. Dad and I had time to take photos with Stephanie before our Uber arrived, and while everyone was getting down to the beach.
She had dad wait down at the bottom of a couple of steps for me to come, and she took pictures of him opening his gift from me, photos of us together, and photos of just me.
Our Uber came, and we realized we didn’t have masks with us. Thankfully the hotel office gave me one. The Uber driver wasn’t friendly at all. Didn’t talk to us about where we were going or why we looked fancy (hi I look like a bride, but you don’t care I guess). We pulled out onto PCH in the middle of some kind of Trump parade. Lots of cars waving their Trump flags and things. Then, sadly, they pulled onto the street we were pulling onto. But we were still able to pull right up to the stairs. Stephanie got pictures of me and my dad going down. Then we had to coordinate who was going to carry my sandals. She decided it would be cute if my dad did.
As we walked along the sand over to the group, strangers on the beach started clapping and cheering. It was really sweet. When our families started cheering and yelling is when I let out a little happy sob.
The crowd parted for us to be able to walk through. Dad paused a minute, but I’m not sure why or what he was waiting for. We hadn’t rehearsed anything, so it was fine. I pulled his arm to keep walking, and he let me go.
Matthew’s dad, Rick, officiated for us. He shared a lot from the Proclamation about families. In the midst of his speech, a wave crashed up to the left of us, and some of Matthew’s side (especially Jenn and Harrison) got super soaked. It was a funny moment that I’ll remember forever. There was chaos for a minute while we tried to get everyone’s attention back.
Matthew and I read our vows. I tried to be loud enough for everyone to hear; the beach is a loud place. When Matthew read his, he had to stop and collect himself several times because he was super emotional. It was so sweet. I love him so much.
After our vows, Rick pronounced us husband and wife, but forgot to have us exchange rings. So the kiss came before the rings, which I was a little sad about, but I’ll probably look back and think it is funny.
We spent the next 30 minutes or more taking photos, which was difficult with the sun so high and bright in our eyes. We did a lot of “open your eyes on three” photos. Stephanie and Jason did great directing everyone.
During photos, we had a lot of people on the beach who wanted to go on the other side to the pirate tower. Most folks waited patiently and were great. Others were bothered at us. One lady in particular, we will call her Karen, started pitching a fit and arguing that we couldn’t keep her from going over there. We would be done by 2, and it was probably 1:40, but she wanted to make a stink. She even went and got the lifeguard. Then of course my mom wanted to get in her face.
Everyone started to depart and go their separate ways. I’m sure lots of hugs were given out, but that is all sort of a blur. During Matthew and I’s photos, I scraped my toe on one of the many rocks in the area. It bled, and I think I bruised it. It’s still hurting and scabbed 11 days later.
As we walked toward the stairs, one couple congratulated us. He was responsible for playing some really loud romantic music after the ceremony was done. He stood up to kiss my hand. They told us that we had made their first experience at Victoria Beach so memorable and special.
I think some of our best photos were taken on the way up the
stairs to leave the beach. People were so great as they passed by us going up
and down, congratulating us.
After that, Matthew, Stephanie, and I loaded into our car rental. Matthew parked in front of someone’s house, so we are lucky we didn’t get towed. I really wanted a shake or smoothie, but everyone else wanted tacos, so we went to Taco Loco down the street. We parked in a parking structure and walked over; Stephanie was barefoot the whole way. I got shrimp and chicken tacos, which were both fine. I was absolutely wiped out, and as a result wasn’t very social with Stephanie, John, Jason, and Emily. The taco guy gave us some alcoholic kombucha. I didn’t have any, not even later that day. I think Matthew tried it a day or two later.
After that, we walked over to Gelato Paradiso. The line was insane. While we deliberated about what to do, my roommate and her boyfriend walked up to us. Of all the places she could be in southern California at that exact same time, she was at the gelato place. How crazy is that!?
We decided we were tired and didn’t want to wait in line for gelato, so we went back to the car, recorded a video on the way to the hotel, and got to the hotel. I panicked for a moment because I realized no one had signed our marriage license (we had already written Shivani, Kevin, and Rick as the officiant). So I had to coordinate with Shivani to come by our hotel.
When we got up to the room, there were rose petals on the floor and the bedspread. All the goodies that Matthew got at his bachelor party plus a lot of extras were on the table for us. Snacks too.
We just had a little while to pass time before going to dinner. We got ready and went to Bayside Restaurant for dinner. Our server was good. We got salad. I got pasta with chicken, and Matthew got steak. Our food was really good. My only complaint is that I asked if they had side salads prior to dinner. He said “yes” but then brought us full priced $28 salads. I still need to write that review. He did give us a free mini bottle of champagne for our wedding. So that was nice.
After that, we went to the pharmacy for some items. Matthew was sunburned, and I needed bandaids for my toe, plus we needed water because I won’t drink sink water.
We slept OK that night.
Sunday morning, we got up and went to breakfast at Stacks Pancake House. I got a waffle with bacon and eggs. Matthew got biscuits and gravy. It was nice to just sit and talk and enjoy each other for a minute.
After that, we drove to Target to get me a new purse since mine broke on Friday. I didn’t like the one I got, and it cost $20! So that was frustrating.
From there we went to the hotel and stayed in for a little while. We gathered our things and went to the beach down by Balboa for a couple of hours. It was so nice just to be on the sand in the warmth. A last hurrah before coming back to the cold weather that hits tomorrow (10/22) in Utah. From there, we went to Bear Flag tacos. I got a fish taco, and we ate chips and guac.
I was a little bratty at that point because I was really hungry, I didn’t want tacos, and I had compromised with the group and gotten tacos the day before. I don’t like tacos. And I had them both days of my wedding weekend. So I was really bothered. I had told Matthew I wanted a coffee, but we hadn’t gotten one. I just felt like we weren’t doing much of what I wanted at all. Being overly hungry and also not getting what I wanted over the weekend pushed me over the edge, so I basically shut down for a few hours. I also wished we had just planned our days better. I went into it expecting that going with the flow would be fine, but really that never works out well for my brain.
I guess I had Matthew really concerned that he did something wrong. He didn’t. We had talked about possibly going to Downtown Disney, but because I was hungry, I fell asleep. He did too, and we woke up kind of late. We went to a burger place called Hopdoddy for burgers and fries. The cookies and cream milkshake she gave us for free was so, so yummy! It was made from custard, so it was extra creamy.
We enjoyed each other’s company while listening to some dudes talk about their sexual experiences in Europe. After that, we were able to hurry over to Gelato Paradiso inside the mall. We arrived two minute before closing.
I actually liked my milkshake way better than the gelato.
After that, we drove over to the pier. It was fun to see all the shops that were open, including a late night donut place, and a cookie place. Worth noting that my gelato tipped over in the cupholder, and without making any kind of an issue about it, Matthew cleaned it up for me. He is just the sweetest.
We walked the pier and then walked along the shore. On our way back to the car, we both picked up a lot of trash off the beach because it upsets both of us that people are dirty and awful.
After that, we went back to the hotel and started packing up our things to be able to leave in the morning. We also tried to coordinate who was driving and could take our stuff home for us.
Monday morning, we packed up pretty quickly, loaded the car, and headed to Sidecar Donuts. I got a butter and salt donut, and Matthew got a maple bacon. He didn’t think it was worth the price. But I loved my Butter and salt! So, so, so yummy!
We decided to let my mom bring our things back to Utah because Matthew’s mom wanted to leave earlier than she had said the day previous, which is fine. So we drove to my house in Glendora to hang with my dad for a little while and drop off our stuff. First, we got Starbucks and Sam’s Club gas. We hung out with dad and talked. Around noon, it was time to go. We said our goodbyes and headed to Ontario airport.
We got through the blessed easy security at Ontario and headed to our gate. I got myself a Core Power protein shake which cost $6 (!!!!). It’s $1.99 at local grocery stores. I was annoyed about that, but I needed food.
Our flight was fine. We took off and landed early. I watched Thor Ragnarok. Matthew watched an X Men Movie.
Matthew’s cousin Jim picked us up at the airport on the new pickup side. We got back to his place in Bountiful, loaded up my car, and I headed out. I grabbed myself and Matthew some Mo Bettahs for dinner, since he planned to come over that night and start living our lives as husband and wife in my (now our) condo.
We unloaded stuff, and Matthew brought his dog with him that very first night, which I hadn’t expected, though I’m not sure why. It caused a little bit of contention since my cat isn’t allowed in my room, and my bedroom is the one haven in the house without animal fur. We were up late talking about that and other things, but we worked everything out. Dexter has done fine sleeping outside the room, and our animals haven’t killed each other.
For regular life after Monday, you can read my October blog
post at the end of the month.
Suffice it to say that the transition to married life and combining homes is quite a bit of work. I think we’ve done really well as a team. I knew I would need a lot of patience and grace from Matthew as I worked through my stress in the transition, having the house be a hot mess for a minute while we organized and sorted. But we are making good progress (and will make more after the roommate leaves), and are starting to get into a little bit of a routine.
Matthew hates my mattress and has slept on the couch the last two nights in hopes he could sleep a little better. I think he’ll be back in bed tonight. That is, until his old bed is set up in the guest room. I think he’ll make regular appearances in there. It’s funny how we struggle to sleep as two grown adults used to sleeping alone. I’m sure we will figure it out, or find a mattress we can agree on.
Overall, I think married life suits me. I am grateful for my husband. I am grateful for all the things that went in our favor on our wedding weekend. I am grateful for everyone who contributed to our party and our ceremony so that it could be exactly what we wanted. So, so much work and so many hands went into it. Our photos look beautiful.
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