Saturday, January 1, 2011

Jobs and 2011

My dad said if his business accelerates I should come work for him as an office manager.

That's the kind of job that requires no brains, little effort, and no stress. I can leave work at work, exercise, and have energy all the time to do what I love and what makes me happy, as well as pursue some new things.

Like a boy I may or may not be interested in.

Plus I'd be making more than twice as much as I am now.

It really depresses me that I worked so hard to get here and work so hard all the time and don't have too much to show for it. Plus, I live in Utah. Ugh. When I am in California, I feel like it is where I belong. It feels like home, and it makes me feel peaceful and happy. I don't know how much longer I can stay where I'm at. 

After I finish my reading endorsement I think I will come back down here and take that job with my dad. And I am completely serious.

I don't feel too much hope at the beginning of the year because to me it's just "tomorrow" with a different number. It's good to always have goals, but not necessarily because it's a new year. On Monday I'll return to the exact same life I had before I came home to California. It's not a bad life, but it's the same one.

So all of this inspiring "new beginnings" stuff just feels like weird propaganda to me. I'm glad that everyone else can find hope in it. That's good. I see things as being the same and hopefully continuing to progress and morph into even better things. That's how I always see it.

Going into 2011 with a constant hope, not a renewed one.

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